Mom Life, Business Life, and Manifesting Through the Messy Middle

Holy shit, y’all.
Mom life mixed with business life? It’s no joke.

We are currently protesting naps in my house, which makes it a whole challenge just to find the time to work or even just breathe. And this? This right here was one of the biggest reasons I never wanted kids in the first place. I didn’t want to live on someone else's schedule. I didn’t want to lose my alone time or have to always put someone else before me.

Well, here we are. In the thick of it.

And let me say this clearly: if I hadn’t gotten sober before I got pregnant, if I hadn’t done a full year of nervous system work and deep inner healing, I would not be doing as well as I am now.

The other night, my son was having such a hard time going to sleep. I was frustrated. My husband Josh said, “I know it’s frustrating,” and I just said, “Thank you for pointing that out, because I really shouldn't be frustrated.” It’s not my son’s fault. He’s learning how to be human, and I’m here to help him. That’s the job. That saying, “They’re not giving you a hard time, they’re having a hard time”? That became my mantra.

So I asked myself again and again… what can I do to comfort? That was it. That was my job.

This whole season has brought me face-to-face with one of the biggest lessons I teach my clients: you cannot compare your journey to anyone else’s.

That applies to mindset, manifestation, motherhood, all of it. I can't compare my baby’s sleep schedule or development to any other kid’s. And I sure can’t compare my own motherhood journey to anyone else's.

I use the What to Expect app to check where we’re “supposed” to be developmentally. And honestly? He’s usually ahead of the curve. But even then, the app forums are just full of worried moms stressing about sleep.

And you know what that makes me think about? How much I used to sleep when I was drinking. That sleep was… different. A foggy escape. Now, I’m functioning on five to six hours a night, with no naps, and I’m okay. I don’t even like napping anymore, it throws me off.

What I’m learning, every single day, is that this season will pass so fast. One day, I’ll miss the nap fights. The bedtime battles. The fact that he only wants to sleep on me. One day, I’ll ache for these moments.

It reminds me of that line from The Office:
“I wish there was a way to know you’re in the good old days before you’ve actually left them.”

The truth is, you are in the good old days… right now.

You’ll miss the quiet cup of coffee on a random Tuesday. You’ll miss breakfast with your parents on Saturdays. You’ll miss those small, slow moments with your partner on the couch. We’re so busy trying to get through life, we forget to actually live it.

I’ve been to more funerals than most people my age. I lost both of my parents within six months of each other. I’ve lost friends, family, mentors. And all that loss gave me a new perspective: we are not guaranteed time.

We didn’t sign a contract when we came to Earth that said, “You’ll get 90 years, guaranteed.” Life doesn’t work that way. You could have 50 more years, or 50 more minutes. You just don’t know.

So the question becomes: how are you living now?

This is the root of manifestation. So often people ask, “Why hasn’t this thing I want manifested yet?” And my answer is: Are you trying to manifest in the future? Because if you’re saying, “In a year I’ll have it,” guess what? It’ll always be a year away.

You manifest in the now. Always.

That’s why gratitude is so important. It anchors you in the present. It helps you see what’s already good. I used to have so much fear around losing it all. Like, “If I spend this money, it’s gone forever and I’ll be broke.” That’s not true. That’s fear talking. And while I still work on that belief (because healing is a process), the question I always come back to is:

What do I have right now?

Right now, I have freedom. I’m wearing pajamas with a necklace, because why not? I get to go to the grocery store in the middle of the day. I get to spend time with my son. My bills are paid. There’s food in the fridge and clean water in my glass. I have internet and a phone I can use to create content that could live online for decades.

What a luxury. What a life.

And we really have to stop wasting our precious days worrying about things that haven’t happened yet.

The fear of losing it all? That’s not the worst thing. The worst thing is wasting your now worrying about a future that hasn’t arrived.

Because even if you did lose everything, you’d be okay. You’re resilient. You’d rise again. Start over. Build something even better.

You don’t need everything to go perfectly to feel secure. You need to know that you’re solid. That you’re going to be okay no matter what. That you love yourself enough to start over if needed.

That’s when things shift.

It’s not “once I have the money, then I’ll feel safe.”
It’s “I feel safe and whole and grounded now,” and the money becomes a byproduct.

When I started loving myself, truly loving myself, that’s when everything changed.
That’s when checks started showing up.
That’s when I had my highest months in business.
That’s when I found my dream home.
That’s when I met my partner.
That’s when getting pregnant was easy.

It wasn’t luck. It was alignment.

Everything that shows up in your outer world is a reflection of your inner world.

So if your relationships are out of alignment, if people are disrespecting you, if things keep falling apart… go within. You have the power to change it. You have the power to choose a different story. You have the power to draw new boundaries and call in something better.

Manifestation starts with you.
Loving yourself.
Trusting your now.
Being grateful for what is instead of obsessing over what’s next.

Because this life you’re living?
It’s already full of magic.

You just have to see it.